As a child, you had access to a sense of wonder and play with little effort. Even if your home life was chaotic, there was an attachment to the imagination that often becomes dampened or stamped out entirely by the realities of growing up. That child is still with you and it likely needs some care. Perhaps allowing yourself to connect to the things that used to make you feel playful will nourish that part of yourself.
Fish: water, messenger, play
Lotus Flowers: self-regeneration, rebirth, renewal